Strong Marriage with Humor

How Does My Husband/ Wife Annoy Me, Let Me Count the Ways

How can you have a strong marriage when you and your partner have such different interests and goals?

My husband is a dairy farmer who needs to spend hours raising and feeding livestock, growing crops, and his milking the cows twice daily. His work hours are long, the equipment he needs is expensive, much of the work is physically demanding, and the weather must cooperate.

I am an educator, I love doing social justice work. I like being around people. I don’t enjoy animals. I like to stay clean, I don’t like to sweat, I love reading, writing, I love to travel.

A strong marriage is not based so much on different interests but on goals. My husband and I both believe in God, family, and commitment. We go to church together and we nurture of family. It also helps that we both have a sense of humor. Once when we could have fought, we wrote these poems:

How Does my Husband Annoy me, Let Me Count the Ways

1. He makes coffee far too strong.

2. He buys treats and then doesn’t hide them from me well enough

3. He uses language when he is irked that borders on swearing.

4. He works too hard.

5. He sometimes chews too loudly and snores too loudly.

6. He eats crackers and bread soaked in milk.

7. He keeps turning the lights off on me even when I plan on being right back.

8. He insists I hang the laundry on the line in good weather.

9. My honey-do list never seems to be a top priority for him.

10. If I want something really badly I’ve learned to ask my daughter to ask

him because he will always do it for her.

How do I Love my Husband? Let Me Count the Ways.

1. He does kiss well.

2. He also cleans and cooks better than me and enjoys doing it.

3. He sings and whistles beautifully.

4. He is a wonderful father and grandfather.

5. He is honest with me.

6. He edits my books carefully

7. He helps me quilt.

8. He admires my dress designs.

9. He encourages me to do the work I love.

10. He balances me out and I do really want to keep him in my life.

How Does My Wife Annoy Me? Let Me Count the Ways.

1. She leaves the lights on.

2. She doesn’t clean out paintbrushes thoroughly

3. She begins projects I’ll have to finish when I have other things to do

4. She puts everything on the bottom cupboard shelves and explains those are the only ones she can reach without a chair.

5. She turns on the oven and forget to bake, or else she burns what she is baking.

6. She always wants to use clean paper in the printer when she can use little used paper

7. She takes baths and leaves her clothes and towels on the floor.

8. She never tightens the lids on the things she opens and the lid comes off and things spill out on the floor (probably my big one.)

9. When she cleans she doesn’t put back things back in the proper place, where I think they belong. (It does make it an adventure to try to find things and this I an adventure I could do without.)

10. I know there are more, but I am waiting for them to come to my mind.

How do I love my wife? Let me count the ways

1. She’s funny and usually cheerful.

2. She designs pretty crocheted dresses and makes quilts.

3. She loves her teaching job.

4. She writes fun children’s picture books

5. She loves our children and grandchildren.

6. She always remembers to kiss me hello and good-bye.

7. She likes to hear about my day.

8. It’s kind of cute she’s never learned to tell east from west except on a flat map.

9. She always remembers family birthdays and anniversaries and special days of many people we both know.

10. She thinks she has to buy or make gifts for every damn occasion.

But all in all, I am glad I married her and I plan to keep her.